“’Harry, you are dreadful! I don’t know why I like you so much’
‘You will always like me, Dorian,’ he replied. ‘Will you have some coffee, you fellows?—Waiter, bring coffee, and fine-champagne, and some cigarettes. No: don’t mind the cigarettes; I have some. Basil, I can’t allow you to smoke cigars. You must have a cigarette. A cigarette is the perfect type of pleasure. It is exquisite, and it leaves one unsatisfied. What more can one want? Yes, Dorian, you will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you have never had the courage to commit.’” (Page 62)
We all have that one friend. That friend that is so raw and true that we feel better about ourselves. That ‘heathen’, pleasure-filled friendship that teaches one more about himself than all of the rest of his friendships put together. Curiosities revisited and fulfilled. Experiences given dare enough to try. Staring down consequence until it feels far-fetched or easy enough to handle. Courage impassioned by stupidity: that’s what these friendships give. It feels a sin so; to say that it is necessary seems quite counterproductive: a sin as the panacea for other sins? Though I feel it is a part of life, which when handled incorrectly drags us in the opposite direction of the Kingdom, but when appropriately responded to, drives us to the innermost fabric of ourselves, and hopefully the Holy Spirit residing there. Anna Nalick wisely wrote in her song, Breathe, “And these mistakes that you’ve made, you’ll just make them again, if you only try turning around.” As sinners, life must always face forward, reverting back leads only to old sin. Our hope is in the future, through the cross. To continue being sanctified as we are justified by grace. Something must drive us forward to this new destination. “We make the paths and God directs our steps”. These people in our lives who are the wild, reckless sinners, often shape us. They break us from the suffocating bubble of Christianity and throw us into the real world. A world full of tools, sin, idols, and pleasure to build our paths. We still have no hope though without Christ, but by understanding his world, understanding our guilty status, understanding sin and depravity, hopefully we can see that standing in front of the burning perfection of a holy God we are equally guilty.
As a side note, Lord Henry describes the cigarette as the perfect form of pleasure, which isn’t all that odd, but the reasoning is quite unfounded. It is as if the perfectness of pleasure is achieved by a perpetual bliss rather than a once in a while climactic experience. A perfect substance indeed, would have these qualities, for it would thus always be needed, but a perfect pleasure seems to imply something glorious done by choice.
This helter-skelter ramble serves to prove that someone must represent to us all the sins we have not the courage to commit, because if not, we will gain such courage. We are hopelessly curious as creatures. However, it is so easy as the case was with Dorian Gray, that as you begin to discover your own sinful desires, someone to do them with can prove a seemingly insurmountable temptation. It is a fine line between gleaning valuable information about things, so as not to have to do them and gleaning so much as to not resist doing them. This type of relationship/ friendship is very crucial. It must come with kindness and respect, but an overdose of either is fatal.
Consequently it seems it was respect which shot down Dorian Gray. His emotion outweighed his reason and his relationship with Lord Henry became far too codependent. Relying on another human to fulfill what only God can truly satisfy. He made Lord Henry an idol, and the more Lord Henry talked, the more Dorian applied. The more he applied the uglier his soul got. I have friendships like this. Some, good ones, but by keeping the balance with friends that push me to be better I can keep looking at least forward if not upward. I will sin many, many more times before I die, but it has always been my opinion, that going back to previous sins is always fatal, new experiences have a glimmer of hope at least. And when I meet the crossroads and don’t know which path to choose. I take the one I haven’t tried before. Pressing forward. Striving upward.
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